I cut my hair!

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Hey peeps! Welcome to another Project Unicorn blog. I’ve been really struggling with my anxiety and depression recently (as I’ve mentioned before) and it just doesn’t seem to be shifting.

After bursting into tears on my GP (family doctor), I was given more anti depressants and told to come back in a month.

However, I’ve been speaking to a great woman at work and she’s recommended a nutritional therapist. This holistic approach really helped her so I’m going  book myself in for a consultation.

I’m also going to contact Let’s Talk because they give free advice and can offer counselling if they think I need it.

 

How do I stay happy?

Hey peeps, and welcome to another (long overdue!) Project Unicorn blog!

I’m so sorry for abandoning this blog for so long! It’s a combination of not being very happy recently (and being a bit unwell) – see video below for more details – and being super busy writing my book (that’s good news!)

I’m feeling better now!

And back to my usual, bubbly self. Ready to record some new Project Unicorn videos and re-engage with positive thinking, promoting happiness to help with mental health, and being a nice person. I was in a really low place a few weeks ago, and even had a dip over the weekend following a migraine, but no matter how many times the nasty little voice in the back of my mind (Steve, as I call him) tells me I’m a failure, too fat, not good enough or not interesting enough to succeed at my ambitions in life, there is a stronger voice at the core of me, that glittery, diamond core, fighting back and saying ‘No. I’m worth it. I deserve to be happy. I deserve to be successful. Nobody can stop me. I believe in myself.’

And the good news is, after all these months and years of saying this to myself, this voice is now louder and stronger than the nasty little Steve the Demon Monkey voice of self-doubt and self-hate.

I’m okay. And I’m going to keep being okay, one day at a time, one step at a time. Even if all I do is breathe, and keep living. Keep going.

So, what makes me happy? What gives me this confidence?

George, the Self-Esteem Cat

This is George. He’s an absolutely AMAZING puppet cat created by Xingcat on YouTube. Xingcat has his own blog, available here: < link > It’s a great read, and I highly recommend following it. He posts a LOT more often than I do, so you won’t be disappointed!!!

All of Xingcat’s videos are inspiring and motivational. THEY’RE ALSO HILARIOUS. But by far, my absolutely favourites are the George Self-Esteem videos.

I’ve said this many times in the comments to Xingcat, but I’m TOTALLY going to teach our children to say ‘I don’t know’ like Dog. If you don’t know how Dog says ‘I don’t know’… you really need to watch a video right now. I’ll wait. This is a blog. It’s not going anywhere. Hehe.

The messages from George are uplifting and easy to digest. I will often watch two or three back to back whilst washing up in the evening. They’re just full of hope and self-acceptance, which is so important. And Xingcat is such an amazing guy – he’s one of the best fellow creators anyone could ask for really, because he shares all of your stuff like a crazy person and is totally committed to supporting fellow creators in this world.

Hats off to you, Xingcat!!!

Life Goals

I was having a development catch up with my line manager the other day, and he asked me what I want to do in 5 years’ time. As I stared down the tunnel of time and imagined 2022, a scary concept because we’ll be in the 20’s, I realised that I wanted to be:

  • A published author (earning money from my books)
  • A professional YouTube creator – Project Unicorn and daily vlogging
  • A teacher – ideally primary school children

And these are just 3 of the things I came up with. I’d also love to be a Creative Writing lecturer, a film maker, run my own homestead, or livery yard, or dog walking and care business…

Yeah, I want to do everything! What I definitely DON’T want to do is stay in my current role, as comfortable as it is, because it doesn’t play to my strengths, it doesn’t challenge me in the areas where I want to grow, and doesn’t fulfil me emotionally or intellectually.

Does, however, pay a nice little salary… Hehe, so I’ll work hard for them until I can find pay my way with my passions.

Darn you, adult life and responsibilities!

Back to Uni!

Back to Uni!

Well, folks… the Christmas break is over. And it’s back to studying. My next assignment is due on the 19th so I’d better crack open my study books again and read the essay question… That’s always a good start.

But all I wanna do is write my book and create YouTube videos! I’ve filmed my first one now and I’m addicted!

It’s not live on YouTube yet as I want to create a couple more and have a little stock of videos ready for if/when people decide to mosey on over and check out the channel. I’ll be sure to post about it here, don’t you worry!!!

Chapter Six is going quite well, though. I’ve been sticking to my New Year’s resolutions ‘fairly’ well so far… I skipped writing a sentence for one day and made up for it by writing about two pages the following day… I’m a bit of a fits-and-bursts writer. Future Editor: sorry ’bout that! Hee hee.

I think the thing I love the most about my YouTube video so far is the little Unicorn at the opening, and the giggle that he makes! I mean, yes, it was my giggle that I recorded, and oh my goodness! It’s so frickin’ CUTE! It makes me laugh so much every time I hear it. Y’know, I may have rewound and listened to the opening giggle like, a thousand times last night, just for fun.

Ah, who needs to be a grown up?

But I really should be semi-responsible. I want to get a better grade in my next assignment. When I first started this second year of my degree, I was shocked at how much I’d forgotten over the summer holidays. My first essay was ABISMAL! No wonder I got such a shocking score. So I pulled my socks up and churned out a better essay the next time. A 15 point improvement, or thereabouts.

Now, to smash the 80% mark like I did last year!

 

New Year’s Resolutions

New Year’s Resolutions

WELCOME TO 2017!

Before I move onto my ‘resolutions’, I want to have a quick look back at 2016.

2016: A Year in Review

April – new job

I left the police behind and got a new job working as a process efficiency specialist for National Grid.They call them Performance Excellence Specialists, but for you normal folk, it basically means that I work with the teams in my department to identify how we could do more with less, and give a better service to our customers.

June – passed my 1st year exam

I’m studying English Literature & Creative Writing with the Open University, part-time over 6 years, and I sat my 1st year exam in June. After much writing (and even more hand cramping!), I PASSED with a pretty decent mark, and went on to start my 2nd year. Woohoo! Only another 4 years to go! Damn me having to work full-time!

December – Project Unicorn Go Live

After many doodles, and much soul-searching with my wife, I launched Project Unicorn. This started with this blog (hello!) and, in January, I will be releasing my first YouTube video. Watch this space for a link!

So what can we look forward to in 2017?

My Creative Resolutions:

  • To write at least 1 sentence of my book every day
  • To create at least 1 Project Unicorn YouTube video every fortnight
  • To post at least 1 Project Unicorn blog every week (even if it’s really short!)

Ideally, I’d like to get into the habit of blogging and vlogging daily, or near-daily, because as and when I become a full-time author (Life Goal), I’ll need the internet interaction to keep me company. As an extrovert, it’s extremely difficult for me to be alone all the time with just my own brain for company. It drives me nuts!

What’s that meme? “ENFP: spends day alone. Questions reason for existence.”

It’s SO true! Haha. Totally me. I’m SUCH  a typical ENFP! I drive my boss nuts half the time, because he’s an ESTJ so, other than being an Extrovert, he’s the total opposite to me, and he has no idea why I talk about creative things and my feelings all the time.

But that’s just the world I live in. I embrace emotions, I think they’re powerful and important. And I think it’s crucial that men do the same.

Yes, I am a proud feminist. No, that doesn’t mean I hate men, or think that women should be superior to men. It means I don’t believe in a patriarchal society, or inequality between genders, or discrimination of any kind.

That’s what being a unicorn is all about. Loving and respecting each and every person for the amazing gifts they bring to this world. I don’t tolerate hate or abuse, and other than that, I accept anyone.

Anyway, I’m done rambling for now. I actually don’t feel very happy today. I’ve got some health issues that are getting me down at the moment, and I thought I was getting better but then the symptoms came back this evening. I just feel like I’ve got a thousand things to do at the moment, and even though I’ve written down a ‘To Do’ list and am only focussing on one or two at a time, they’re still buzzing around and around my head. And all I want to do is write my book but when I come to sit down and stare at the screen, at that stupid blinking cursor, or a page of my notebook… nothing.

HOWEVER. Positive thinking, dude.

I DID manage to tweak a bit of writing I’d done previously. And I’ve washed some dishes, done the food shop and have put on a washload of work clothes.

And done a blog.

Okay, I feel a bit better now. I’m going to scratch out one more sentence of Hybrid (the book) and then perhaps reward myself with a bit of Skyrim.

Toodles!

 

 

 

 

My first post!

My first post!

Hi everyone and welcome to Project Unicorn!

I’m Laura, and I’m starting this site as the precursor to my YouTube channel (links to be set up once I’ve found the sparkly courage to get up in front of a camera!)

In the following posts, I’ll be talking about my life, including my depression and migraines, my everyday happiness, my writing (I’m a fiction writer working on a teen vampire series) and my family.

I may also include some bits and pieces about continuous improvement in here, because that’s what I do for a living right now and it can be pretty interesting.

Hope you have fun!

Next time, I’m DEFINITELY using my laptop though! My phone is so slow! I’d be here till I was a wizened old lady if I had to write my book on this thing!

FYI, snippet into today’s life. Played fetch with my dog, Lilly for 45 minutes earlier and actually forgot how to throw after a while! Thanks goodness she throws the ball herself sometimes. Looking after my sister in law’s cats right now and got an affectionate nibble from one of them. What normal animals consider to be aggression, cats use to show affection… I love em.